I recently completed Style Therapy by Lauren Messiah—a workbook-style book that helps you dig deep into your style and ask what it is you really want to present to the world. For me, it sparked a series of realizations:
- I hold on to a lot of clothing for sentimental reasons, even when it no longer fits or suits my life.
- I need to do a serious wardrobe cleanse.
- I need to go shopping—with intention.
While I haven’t yet filled my wardrobe with new pieces, I now have clarity on how I want to shop and what I want to wear.
One of the most impactful exercises in the book was describing your style in three words—broken down by occasion. This helped me create a consistent style identity and filter for decision-making. Here’s what I came up with:
- Work (including client meetings): Polished, Graceful, Tailored
- Weekend/Casual: Effortless, Charming, Refined
- Events/Special Occasions: Radiant, Elegant, Vivacious
Ultimately, I want my style to reflect these core values: feminine, classic, professional, put-together, and confident—with that timeless, Southern-lady charm.
But I’m also learning to give myself grace. Not every outfit needs to serve the world. Some days, I’ll be wearing my wildest leggings and a comfy T-shirt—and that’s okay. Style isn’t about perfection; it’s about alignment.
What Style Therapy really gave me was a vision. Now when I shop or consider a piece of clothing, I ask:
“Does this align with the woman I’m becoming?”
If the answer is no, it stays on the rack.
I still have work to do—and a little shopping to enjoy—but now I know I’m curating a wardrobe that tells the right story.
What are your style goals? Have you defined your three-word descriptions yet? I’d love to hear them in the comments.